Fuck, Fuck, and Away!

So, of course, the hooker was not enough for my sex-crazed ass this weekend so naturally, I hooked up with X. We partied for a few hours and apparently I turned him on so much (I WAS in an extra slutty mood, lol) that he came before he wanted to. Afterwards, he was insistent on leaving and said he didn't think he could go again. Incredibly, we had only gone through one of the bags of coke. I asked him if he could just wait for a little while to see if he was really done. That lasted about 10 minutes before he decided he was leaving for sure. I was disappointed, but he said he would leave me the other bag for myself so I could keep going with someone else if I wanted...SCORE!

He said he was just going to take a few lines for himself, which i discovered later was about half of the bag...FUCK. Anyway, I did end up hooking up with another dude later, but by that time I was so damn tired, I could barely do anything. I apologized to him and told him I'd make it up to him next time. I DID make him cum, but it just wasn't very exciting. He was cool about it though.

I've gotten better at dealing with the crash afterwards. Last night, I just made sure I kept thinking about sex the entire time (otherwise depressing thoughts tend to sink in). It worked for the most part. Still, later on, I wondered when this shit is going to end if ever. I wondered if this is how I'm going to die. I guess I'm having some fun at least. Still lonely as fuck though. I don't know if that will change. That's the thing that bothers me the most.